Always looking for sunshine, figuratively and lite Always looking for sunshine, figuratively and literally. Sometimes we don’t have to look very far and it finds us. ☀️
It didn’t take much to get me to @mikespastasand It didn’t take much to get me to @mikespastasandwichshoppe when a friend texted me a screenshot of their cheese butter. Up until last week I had never even heard of cheese butter but just two days later, I’m driving an hour round trip to get some. 😂 I was never one to succumb to peer pressure (I didn’t have my first drink until I was 21!), but when it comes to food finds, I am very easily intrigued. After all, that’s how I’ve discovered some of my favorite bites over the years … lardo from @butlerandtheboard, a spicy Italian sausage, and my love of chicharron. If you haven’t visited Mike’s in Nutley, it’s worth a visit. While there, I also got a small tray of meatballs (a bargain at $10!) and a delicious mortadella sandwich that is worth a round trip. ✨
The long, dreary and grey months of the Winter nee The long, dreary and grey months of the Winter need a little bit of color, so here you go. 😍 Love this chest of drawers. Discovered it buried in a local shop and bought it specifically for the green color (one of my favorites). Vintage Coke crate was a $10 score from a garage sale place on Facebook some ten years ago. And the assorted markers in Roy G Biv order (natch) that aren’t used anymore because my kids have sadly left that phase. 🙃
Weekend Photos in Review, old school still photo s Weekend Photos in Review, old school still photo style, hope you had a good one! ✨
A friend was taking a trip to Ireland and asked if A friend was taking a trip to Ireland and asked if I wanted her to bring me back anything. Would you believe me if I told you I asked for salt? I love picking up different varieties, whether we’re traveling or I’m just visiting a new shop. Maddie grabbed me a super cute one from her trip to Paris last year, and the Magic Unicorn Salt I get locally is another favorite. What’s yours?
One of us hops like a bunny down the steps, has a One of us hops like a bunny down the steps, has a serious case of FOMO on the daily, gets hiccups more than anyone we know and has perpetual bed head. She’s quite the unique roommate but may be exactly what our home needed. 💛
I haven’t had a bagel in ages, but when I saw th I haven’t had a bagel in ages, but when I saw that @njdotcom had picked six bagel shops at the “best in the state,” and one was reasonably local, all the sudden I needed one. I was never one to fall prey to peer pressure, but I’m very definitely a marketer’s dream. 😂 Alfa Bagels is on Route 10 in Randolph and has a good assortment of bagels, including all the usual suspects, but with a few others like rainbow, Asiago and French Toast throw in for good measure. Their bagels always seem to have a nice chew, which I appreciate and I love their sesame one. My go-to order lately is a double toasted flagel with lox spread and tomato. Their lox spread is a little ho hum, but the bagel is delish. Check them out next time you’ve got a craving (or get motivated by a local news story 😝). What’s your bagel order?
✌🏻 ✌🏻
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Sweetnicks

Food and Life

The Day My Heart Broke

October 22, 2012 · Narrative

timely fortune
After nearly a year and a half together, Mystic and I had developed an awesomely comfortable ebb and flow. I loved us for that. But sometimes even when something seems so good, it fails anyway and we are powerless to stop it.

Mystic and I broke up a little over a month ago. I chose not to write about it originally because I hoped it would be a bump, and not the end. That we could fix what was broken and one day look back on it. So in the beginning of September, I said that I was going through some personal things. And I was purposely vague. Mostly because some of it I couldn’t talk about here (and in truth, not all of September’s rottenness had to do with our break-up), and some of it I wasn’t ready to. And all the sudden, my phone lit up with text messages asking if I was ok.

I am a very lucky girl. No doubt about it.

I also waited because I couldn’t talk about it without crying.

Break-ups suck, no matter the circumstances.

I don’t have easy explanations. Because there aren’t any. He is a good, good man, and he was good to me and my kids. And there is a huge void there now. Huge. I see him in everything I touch, and that makes it so much harder to go through this. I have to pass his house every day, twice a day, because it’s on the same street as Madeline’s school. And the kids, oh those kids miss him something fierce.

But that doesn’t change the facts.

I’m sad. And a bit broken. Mystic became such a big part of our lives. Although it took me awhile, it was a big deal that I let him in the way I did. Sure, I’ve dated since getting divorced. But Mystic reached me in a way other men didn’t. He made me feel safe and like I had a partner.

Of course there were always challenges. Tugs. We have five kids between us. Ages 4 through 19. In five different schools. They all have different needs. At different times. And are in many different stages. He works two jobs. I work full-time, plus freelancing, and creative dabbles. Two ex-spouses. It’s just not easy.

I don’t have a happy spin on this. I know I will look back on this many months from now, and it won’t hurt quite as much. That it’s just another chapter in life’s great big book. Until then, I’m just not there yet. I think about him and what we had all the time and wish that this weren’t so. Who knows what the future holds. In the meantime, I will be doing what I do best. Focusing on me and the kids and putting one foot in front of the other.

xoxo

*I got the above fortune a few weeks back, which I thought was pretty timely. And uplifting. And now, at home, on our fortune wall. And, of course, the first post I found when I was searching for a picture of our fortune wall was this one. Sigh.

* You’ll still be seeing his name here and there on future posts because we still see his daughter, and I also have a plethora of reviews to get through from places that Mystic and I visited when we were still together.

Onward!

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Posted In: Narrative

Comments

  1. Sarah Caron says

    October 22, 2012 at 11:13 pm

    My heart breaks for you — but you are a strong, beautiful, wonderful, kind woman. You will survive, and thrive.
    Sarah Caron recently posted..Pumpkin Cheesecake Monkey Bread

    Reply
  2. SIL says

    October 23, 2012 at 6:17 am

    I’m so sorry to hear that. Know there is a great man out there waiting for you. It took me a long time to find mine but it was worth the wait.

    SIL

    Reply
  3. Joanne says

    October 23, 2012 at 6:31 am

    Ah my love. I second Sarah’s comment. It sucks right now I’m sure…but with each day it won’t hurt quite as much and one day a few months from now you’ll realize that you hadn’t thought about it at all the previous day. That’s just always the way it is.
    Joanne recently posted..Recipe: Lasagna Soup

    Reply
  4. paula says

    October 23, 2012 at 8:50 am

    I’m sorry. I had noticed that Mystic was no longer being mentioned but it didn’t seem likely that this was the reason.

    You’re right – there really isn’t a way to put a good spin on it, you just have to ride out the pain.
    paula recently posted..This blog is not dead. It’s just in a coma.

    Reply
  5. Laura says

    October 23, 2012 at 11:10 am

    thinking of only happiness for you…
    Laura recently posted..Fill In The Blank Friday….

    Reply
  6. patsy says

    October 23, 2012 at 12:14 pm

    I’m so sorry to hear this! As the others have said, it will hurt less with time. I also had noticed he wasn’t being mentioned much and wondered if something might have happened… I decided not to pry since sometimes personal things have to be worked through before you share them with the rest of the world. I’m sending big huge hugs your way as you work through it.
    patsy recently posted..Tate’s Bake Shop Baking for Friends {Chocolate Chip Muffins}

    Reply
  7. Michelle says

    October 23, 2012 at 6:44 pm

    Sending you hugs, Cate. So sorry to hear the news :(

    Reply
  8. Paula Ann says

    October 23, 2012 at 11:14 pm

    You are wise beyond your years, Cate. I so admire that you have been very selective in who you invite into your life. You are a bright, beautiful, talented girl with two wonderful children. There are great guys out there, and when the time is right, you’ll find the one who is meant to be with you. I’ve been there myself. I’m so sorry you’re having to go through this.

    Reply

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Always looking for sunshine, figuratively and lite Always looking for sunshine, figuratively and literally. Sometimes we don’t have to look very far and it finds us. ☀️
It didn’t take much to get me to @mikespastasand It didn’t take much to get me to @mikespastasandwichshoppe when a friend texted me a screenshot of their cheese butter. Up until last week I had never even heard of cheese butter but just two days later, I’m driving an hour round trip to get some. 😂 I was never one to succumb to peer pressure (I didn’t have my first drink until I was 21!), but when it comes to food finds, I am very easily intrigued. After all, that’s how I’ve discovered some of my favorite bites over the years … lardo from @butlerandtheboard, a spicy Italian sausage, and my love of chicharron. If you haven’t visited Mike’s in Nutley, it’s worth a visit. While there, I also got a small tray of meatballs (a bargain at $10!) and a delicious mortadella sandwich that is worth a round trip. ✨
The long, dreary and grey months of the Winter nee The long, dreary and grey months of the Winter need a little bit of color, so here you go. 😍 Love this chest of drawers. Discovered it buried in a local shop and bought it specifically for the green color (one of my favorites). Vintage Coke crate was a $10 score from a garage sale place on Facebook some ten years ago. And the assorted markers in Roy G Biv order (natch) that aren’t used anymore because my kids have sadly left that phase. 🙃
Weekend Photos in Review, old school still photo s Weekend Photos in Review, old school still photo style, hope you had a good one! ✨

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Always looking for sunshine, figuratively and lite Always looking for sunshine, figuratively and literally. Sometimes we don’t have to look very far and it finds us. ☀️
It didn’t take much to get me to @mikespastasand It didn’t take much to get me to @mikespastasandwichshoppe when a friend texted me a screenshot of their cheese butter. Up until last week I had never even heard of cheese butter but just two days later, I’m driving an hour round trip to get some. 😂 I was never one to succumb to peer pressure (I didn’t have my first drink until I was 21!), but when it comes to food finds, I am very easily intrigued. After all, that’s how I’ve discovered some of my favorite bites over the years … lardo from @butlerandtheboard, a spicy Italian sausage, and my love of chicharron. If you haven’t visited Mike’s in Nutley, it’s worth a visit. While there, I also got a small tray of meatballs (a bargain at $10!) and a delicious mortadella sandwich that is worth a round trip. ✨
The long, dreary and grey months of the Winter nee The long, dreary and grey months of the Winter need a little bit of color, so here you go. 😍 Love this chest of drawers. Discovered it buried in a local shop and bought it specifically for the green color (one of my favorites). Vintage Coke crate was a $10 score from a garage sale place on Facebook some ten years ago. And the assorted markers in Roy G Biv order (natch) that aren’t used anymore because my kids have sadly left that phase. 🙃
Weekend Photos in Review, old school still photo s Weekend Photos in Review, old school still photo style, hope you had a good one! ✨
A friend was taking a trip to Ireland and asked if A friend was taking a trip to Ireland and asked if I wanted her to bring me back anything. Would you believe me if I told you I asked for salt? I love picking up different varieties, whether we’re traveling or I’m just visiting a new shop. Maddie grabbed me a super cute one from her trip to Paris last year, and the Magic Unicorn Salt I get locally is another favorite. What’s yours?
One of us hops like a bunny down the steps, has a One of us hops like a bunny down the steps, has a serious case of FOMO on the daily, gets hiccups more than anyone we know and has perpetual bed head. She’s quite the unique roommate but may be exactly what our home needed. 💛
I haven’t had a bagel in ages, but when I saw th I haven’t had a bagel in ages, but when I saw that @njdotcom had picked six bagel shops at the “best in the state,” and one was reasonably local, all the sudden I needed one. I was never one to fall prey to peer pressure, but I’m very definitely a marketer’s dream. 😂 Alfa Bagels is on Route 10 in Randolph and has a good assortment of bagels, including all the usual suspects, but with a few others like rainbow, Asiago and French Toast throw in for good measure. Their bagels always seem to have a nice chew, which I appreciate and I love their sesame one. My go-to order lately is a double toasted flagel with lox spread and tomato. Their lox spread is a little ho hum, but the bagel is delish. Check them out next time you’ve got a craving (or get motivated by a local news story 😝). What’s your bagel order?
✌🏻 ✌🏻

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